5 Tips for a Magical Bedtime Routine (That Actually Work)
Ask any parent what the hardest part of the day is, and a surprising number will say bedtime. Not the early morning rush. Not the after-school chaos. Bedtime.
The negotiations. The "one more glass of water." The sudden desperate need to discuss the plot of a film they watched three weeks ago.
Here's what we've learned — from research, from our own kids, and from the thousands of families using Wisp — about making bedtime not just manageable, but genuinely something to look forward to.
1. Start the Wind-Down Earlier Than You Think
The biggest mistake most parents make is treating bedtime as an event that starts at bedtime. For children's nervous systems, the transition from active play to sleep-readiness needs at least 30–45 minutes of runway.
Think of it like a landing approach. You don't drop altitude at the last moment — you start the descent early.
What this looks like in practice:
- Screens off 45 minutes before lights out (not 10 minutes).
- Move to quieter activities: puzzles, drawing, Lego, or a calm audiobook.
- Dim the lights in the living room — this signals the body that night is coming.
The earlier you start cueing the nervous system, the less resistance you'll meet at the actual bedtime moment.
2. Make the Routine Predictable (and Let Them Own It)
Children thrive on predictability. A bedtime routine that is the same every night — in the same order — becomes automatic. Instead of every step being a negotiation, it becomes a ritual.
What the research suggests is that children who have a role in creating the routine are significantly more likely to follow it. So sit down one afternoon and build it together. Write it on a whiteboard. Let them illustrate it if they're that age.
A simple example routine:
- Tidy one small thing (puts them in a helpful mindset)
- Bath or wash face and hands
- Pyjamas and brush teeth
- One story or Wisp session
- Lights out with a short breathing exercise
When the routine is theirs, it's not something being done to them — it's something they own.
3. The Story Is the Reward, Not the Compromise
Here's a small but meaningful reframe: don't position bedtime stories as the thing that happens after all the hard bits. Make the story the centrepiece — the thing the whole routine is leading to.
Tell them at dinner: "Tonight after your bath, we're going to find out what happens next in the forest." Build anticipation. Let the story be the thing they're excited about as they brush their teeth.
When children are looking forward to the next part of the routine, they move through the earlier parts faster and with less resistance.
Interactive stories like Wisp work particularly well here because your child has genuine agency — they made a choice last night, and tonight they find out what happened because of it. That's a genuinely compelling reason to get into bed.
4. Your Calm Is Contagious
Children are exquisitely attuned to parental stress. If you're rushing, tense, or clearly just trying to get them down so you can have your evening — they feel it. And it makes them harder to settle, not easier.
This is the hardest tip to follow because it requires something of you, not just your child. But it's also the most high-leverage.
A few things that help:
- Build 10 minutes of buffer into your mental timeline. If you think bedtime will take 20 minutes and it takes 30, you'll stay calmer than if you thought it should take 15.
- If you're tired and depleted, give yourself permission for a shorter routine — one story instead of two, a quieter conversation rather than a long one. A calm shorter routine is better than a stressed longer one.
- Try to make the story time feel like something you're enjoying, not enduring. Kids know the difference.
5. End on Warmth, Not Instructions
The last thing your child hears before they close their eyes matters. Their brain is moving into consolidation mode — and whatever emotional note the day ends on tends to stick.
Try to make the last 60 seconds warm, specific, and positive. Not "remember you have football tomorrow" or "don't forget your water bottle". Something like:
"I really liked how you helped your sister today." "That story choice you made was so clever — I didn't see it coming." "I love you. Sleep well."
That's what they'll be drifting off to. Make it something good.
Bedtime is one of the few moments in a busy day when everything slows down and it's just you and your child. With a little intention, it can be the part of the day you both love the most.
That's what we're building Wisp to be. We hope it becomes part of your evenings.